Sometimes that’s all it is; years. Lauren Hill is by no means the first to be loved and left. It happens to women everyday, and she is proof that it can happen to anyone; famous or general population. We spend so much time and effort loving our men and caring for our children; we lose sight of who we once were and who we could/ should be growing into.
Long-term relationships don’t always guarantee a “forever”. People grow and evolve as life changes and people age. You should be constantly growing and learning as a couple, but also as an individual. Spice is the variety of life. No one wants to have the same conversation daily. That is why it is so important to experience life, as you grow old.
You can have as many babies for a man as you choose, but that’s not going to keep him home. It won’t force him to marry you either. Women sometimes think that having a child will save a relationship, when it can actually drive a deeper wedge in an already weakening bond. Children are a gift, but they are also a permanent responsibility. Attempting to devote time to a growing child, while salvaging a failing relationship is difficult and unfair to the child.
Sometimes I feel that men will marry the first person that crosses their path once they have declared themselves ready for marriage, but I won’t generalize. The woman who patiently waited in the shadows, whether asked or not, most of the time sacrificed herself in the process, and ended up being uninvited to a wedding that she dreamt would be hers.
What can we do to avoid being in a relationship where all that is left is “years”? Let a man know he doesn’t truly have boundaries and he will continue to cross them. Set your own guidelines for what you will and will not tolerate. I don’t suggest women stop loving. Conversely, I think a lot of us, author included, need to learn to love a little smarter.
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